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We are winding down now at the Palm Springs International Short Film Festival and the actual judging has begun. These are notes I made as a juror back in 2000 and I hope they give some sense of what it was like. 

TV camera and reporter

Aug. 5

I was interviewed by the TV crew at the hospitality suite.

“I’ve seen a lot of very good movies,” I told the camera, with its light glaring in my eyes. “And no dogs. The quality level has been surprisingly high.”

“What about the filmmakers,” the camera asked.

“They ask, ‘Have you seen my film?,’ but of course, what they really mean is, ‘Did you like my film?’ ”

What I really meant to say is, when they ask, “Did you like my film,” what they really mean is, “Did you like ME?”

What I did say to the camera was, “Artists are so needy.”

The jurors symbolically bought lunch for the filmmakers today — the Festival paid for it, but we were there to “serve” it, which really meant just being there as the food was eaten. TV crews came, piles of Mexican food in drifts on the tables were gobbled up.

The filmmakers mainly talked to each other; they speak the same language. The jurors mainly spoke to each other for the same reason.

“I expected to be bothered more by the filmmakers,” I mentioned to Andy Friedenberg. “Fred said they would be on us all the time.”

“I thought so, too,” Andy said. “They must have gotten to them before it started and warned them not to talk to the judges.”

Nevertheless, a number have come up and looked at my judge’s neck tag and asked with the faces of puppy dogs if I had seen their films.

“That film is in my category,” I would respond.

“Have you seen it yet?”

“It’s in my category.”

It must have driven them nuts.

“Have you seen my film?,” another asked.

I parried, asking him which film it was. I was only looking at professional films and I thought he might be a student, which would get me off the hook.

“Are you student or professional?,” I asked.

“Well, I’m not enrolled in any school, so I guess I’m a professional.”

I thought, that’s a perfect way to define professionalism.

Jack Ofield

Jack Ofield

We started the day with breakfast with Jack. He explained how he got from arctic Canada to San Diego, beginning as a painter planning a career selling gallery art, moving on to scenery painting in local theaters, moving up to directing local theater, thence to a special program for local theater people at the Canadian Film Board, where he learned from Norman McLaren, then on to a life in TV documentaries and to a position as filmmaker in residence at Sand Diego State University.

“I don’t know anything about teaching,” he says he told them.

“A professor took me aside and said, ‘Do you know how much we work? We get three months off for summer, we teach three or four classes a week. The salary is fantastic and they’re offering you tenure. Are you nuts?

“So I took the job.”

We talked over the documentaries. His choices were diametrically opposed to my choices. The two films I voted for were both questionable as documentaries, but I figured, if the Festival accepted them as documentaries, it wasn’t up to me to second guess them. Besides, the films I liked were rich with the sensibilities of their makers. Personal films with distinct points of view. When you finished with them, you got the feeling you knew something about the men who made them.

Jack, on the other hand, chose more traditional documentaries.

“I’m just not sure your films are documentaries at all,” he said.

We argued back and forth, in a good natured way.

“When the Maysles brothers began,” I argued, “there were plenty of people who didn’t think what they did was documentary, either. The camera changed the course of the action they filmed. People acted differently because they knew the camera was running. Now, we have no trouble with them. You complain that the film I love has people in it who are acting, and therefore they can’t be considered documentary. But what they act is the only way to show what was going on inside the head of the filmmaker. It is accurate and factual to the interior life of the filmmaker, and that is what he is making the documentary about. You can’t stick a camera in his ear and see what’s going on in his head. You have to show it metaphorically. That is what the recreations and fictionalized scenes do. They can’t show mere fact, so they attempt to show truth.”

Jack wudn’t having any of it.

At any rate, I finally offered a compromise. We could give first place to his choice if he would allow us to give second place to my choice.

Agreed.

We didn’t discuss our other category in depth, because we had both not seen all the entries yet. But based on what we did say, we won’t have such a difficulty agreeing on a winner.

Carole and I went to the office after breakfast to watch the day’s films in my category — professional live action films 15 minutes or under.

There were some very good ones.

As we were watching I heard someone enter the office and talk to the receptionist.

“Are you a filmmaker?,” the receptionist asked.

“No, but my son is,” she said.

Back in the year 2000, it is day 4 of the Palm Springs International Short Film Festival, for which I am one of six jurors. These were my notes at the time. 

MST3K

Aug. 4

Each day is a constant challenge to organize. The films I need to see to judge are scattered through mixed programs, some of which overlap. To catch up on the films I miss in the theater, I have to go to the Festival office to see on video. But sometimes the time it takes to watch the videos cuts into the next theater session, meaning I have to catch up all over again. It is a never-ending task. At the end of today, I have seen 74 films to judge, and many more outside my categories. By the end of the festival, I will have seen 91 of them.

I am becoming glazed over with short films. I can hardly tell them apart anymore. Sensitive guys learning to be gay, assertive women learning to be shallow, lesbian grandmothers teaching their grandchildren how to be themselves, men in flophouses learning to wear gold lame.

I should say something about the other jurors. We met at the beginning of the festival, but because we are seeing different categories, we rarely come across one another now. Except when we meet at the Festival office and jockey for video stations to watch films. The stations are prioritized. Jack Ofield likes the one in the carrel, separate from everyone else. Only one can sit and view films there.

The largest screen is in the east viewing area. It is usually chosen first by whoever is there. It is a mini theater and many can pull up chairs and watch.

A conference room down the hall has a small TV with a built-in VHS player. The chairs in that room are hard and the lights a little glary and the video player has no remote, which means we cannot pause during the credits to read something.

Finally, in the back of the office is the dubbing station, used by the Festival staff to copy tapes. The set is tiny and only plays mono sound, so some tapes sound like crap in it: You only wind up hearing one track of the stereo sound.

jack ofield 1

Jack Ofield

Jack is in my category, but he is an odd squirrelly fellow with shaggy hair. He’s about 60, I would guess, and is here with his wife, although we never see her. She has the car, so Jack is always bumming rides from here to there. He has a kind of lost look in his eyes and so far has been very good at not tipping his hand.

He has a PBS show called The Short List and obviously sees a lot of shorts. He also teaches filmmaking at San Diego State University.

We talked briefly about the Documentary category today, since we saw the last of them. It sounds as if his tastes are wildly different from mine and we agreed to meet for breakfast to discuss the category. He really liked the flophouse film, which I thought overlong and rather ordinary. We’ll have to see how it goes tomorrow.

sharon wu 2

Sharon Wu

Sharon Wu is a film instructor at the California Institute of the Arts and has been a judge at Palm Springs for at least 4 years now. A recidivist.

Every time we have gone to the office to watch videos, Wu is there. It seems as if she must watch all the films on tape. She is about 40 and just had a baby, which she calls the first baby of the Palm Springs Short Film Festival. She is well liked by all and a genuine regular.

Selese

Selise Eiseman

Selise Eiseman is director of programs for a group called Women in Films. She is married and a mother, thickly built and seemingly humorless, although I haven’t really had enough exposure to her to say that with assurance.

Andy Friedenberg is a shaved headed guy who is director of the Cinema Society of San Diego. He seems jolly and connected. He reminds me almost dead-on of Evan Handler on It’s Like… You Know.

andy friedenberg

Andy Friedenberg

(Outdated reference note from 2016: Handler was a regular on many TV shows more recently, including Californication and as Alan Dershowitz on American Crime Story: The People vs. O.J. Simpson. But if the ref is too arcane, let’s just substitute Howie Mandel.)

Finally, Norman Gerard is a producer, writer and director of films. He talks like an industry insider, and is quickly dismissive of anything that seems to him to be a demo tape for an actor, suspicious of anything done on video instead of film, and he has that slightly curdling quality of the inappropriately intimate — you know, the kind of guy who calls me “Dick” the first time he meets me, or like the waiter who tells you his life story.

norman gerard

Norman Gerard

Fred Linch is the jury-meister, and is always lining us up with parties to go to when we have no time, or interviews with reporters who never call or get-togethers with filmmakers and studio people when I have to be at a screening. He is big bellied and jovial, with a gravelly baritone and — as I mentioned before — one missing front upper tooth that he seems unaware of.

I’m sure I must seem just as odd to them, always coming to screenings or office viewings with my wife. Carole and I are pretty close to inseparable. I rely on her taste and judgment, but I think the other jurors are perhaps a bit dismissive of her, telling her places she might like to visit while I judge films. Shopping malls and spas — you know, girl things.

Little do they know Carole.

It is the second day of the Palm Springs International Short Film Festival in 2000 and I am one of six jurors looking at dozens of shorts, of varying degrees of eptness and ineptness. Four more days to go after this one. 

palm springs post card

August 2

Breakfast at 8:30 with my fellow jurors and Fred Linch. We are introduced to the “juror wranglers,” who will follow us around and make sure we do what we’re supposed to. They will make sure we don’t miss any of our films.

Because screenings began yesterday — we didn’t know it; we weren’t told — we had to catch up on a few films, so after lunch, we drove to the festival office to watch videos of them. When we got there, juror Jack Ofield was already watching. We went through a quick dozen of them and managed to finish in time to get to the 5 p.m. program at the theater.

I won’t go over the films individually here, but I should note a few trends. It seems that short films are for short people. Over and over, the films were about talented and sensitive children and their loutish parents. It seemed a film couldn’t go by without an adult punching, slapping or otherwise bruising a quiet, sensitive youngster. Some of these films were good, some middling, some bad. But the theme pervaded.

There was a lot of street begging, too.

Another thing I noticed is that short films are slower than features. Although they follow less action and their plots are more compact, the camera will follow an action endlessly, letting us savor every millimeter and moment. Where a mainstream film will cut from one significant action directly to another, avoiding the transitions as needless upholstery, the short film will pretty well pass up the important action — often too complex or expensive to film — and concentrate on the transition, letting the camera linger excruciatingly over the character rising from his chair and walking step by painful step all the way over to the door, grab the door handle, turn it a full 140 degrees, slowly, with every creak of metal, and open the door, finally walking into the next room, closing the door behind him. The main part of the scene, however, is likely to be played out elliptically.

We see a lot of waiting in the films, too. Rain falls and we wait. The elevator is paged and we wait. Life in short films is full of waiting. Pensive, portentous, meaningful waiting.

In general, the foreign entries are less trivial than the American ones. The American films tend to be about the peeves of young Americans, their boyfriends, girlfriends and parents, all miffed at each other. Or they are about nothing but rehashed feature film ideas: ghost stories, superheroes, action adventures, all concocted out of previously-owned plot material. Characterization is brief and sketchy, pretty much borrowing “types” familiar from other films.

The American films have a tendency to be flashy, slickly made and banal. The European and Latin American films seem to be more concerned with actual life, not life as learned from the TV screen.

As we left the theater to go and grab a quick bite for dinner we passed a man on a cell phone making a deal in the parking lot. He held his briefcase in the same hand as the phone and it wagged off one side of his head like a giant Dumbo ear.

“I welcome your energy,” he said.

Dinner was at a health food restaurant. Carole had the carrot shaving and alfalfa sprout burrito and I had the avacado and lettuce quesadilla. It was said to be quite nourishing.

Meanwhile, a man came in and looked at their magazine rack.

“Do you have the Yogurt News?” he asked.

Bergman DeathWe had to rush back to the theater for the 8 p.m. showing of Jewish documentaries, mostly involving the holocaust. Scary looking stuff, but the real winner was a film called King of the Jews, which took a very personal look at the image of Jesus as seen by a young Jewish boy who was deathly afraid of Jesus. It was all made up of clips of family films and old movies, set to the music of Bartok and Arvo Part. It made me cry. It gets my vote for best documentary. At least, so far.

There was also a Brazilian short about Bergman’s pasty-faced Death looking for his next appointment in a bar and having a drink with a suicide. It was a scream, with a paunchy Death and a couple of absurd deaths.

We got back to the hotel by about 11 p.m. in time to go to bed and wake up for the next day’s haul.

I wrote a fair share of movie reviews as a critic with The Arizona Republic. Because of my interest, I was chosen in 2000 to be a juror at the Sixth Annual Palm Springs International Short Film Festival by event  director Fred Linch. I recently rediscovered the daily notes I made during my sojourn in Palm Springs, and will post them over the next several days. 

palm springs night

August 1, 2000

I am a juror at the Sixth Annual Palm Springs International Short Film Festival and I’ll be seeing something like 250 films over the next five days.

The festival is the largest international short film festival in North America, a title that I notice is worded quite explicitly, with a lot of loopholes.

Nevertheless, opening night festivities are crowded with about 400 people. Some are jurors, like me. Others are presenters, even more are filmmakers and industry flacks. There are corporate sponsors and a sizable army of hangers on. You recognize them by their heavy makeup and garish black costumes. One fortyish woman in black capri pants looked as if, not counting her silicone, she must have weighed 80 pounds. Counting the silicone, I doubt I could have picked her up. Her chest rose like twin balloons, held down by twine. If she had inhaled too sharply, I think her chest would have strangled her.

The event began with the usual procession of officials making slack jokes and applauding each other. The city councilman congratulated himself, and then everyone else he knew, either personally or by reputation. The schoolkid who designed the poster was applauded and given a prize check. The jurors were identified from the podium. We had to stand and let ourselves be known. Later this proved amusing.

line to enter theater

After the ceremonies, we watched five short films, all rather on the longish side, but probably worth seeing. Then the lights came up and we all exited the theater and joined the buffet in the parking lot.

Lines formed everywhere for the tiny Mexican burritos, the tiny enchiladas and the baby-size tacos. Drinks were a couple of bucks and they were going fast.

There were only a few tables and chairs, and they were full, so we walked around with our plates in our hands, popping chicken wings into our mouths and licking the grease off.

One young man with a handful of promo cards shoved one in my hand.

“You’re that judge, aren’t you?”

“Yes, I guess I am.”

“Well, make sure you see this film.” He slapped one of the cards in my empty hand. “Riddle of Ararat,” it read. “World premiere of a film by Robin Simmons, produced by George Adams.”

“Is an ancient volcano at the center of the earth’s land mass the hiding place of Noah’s Ark?,” is said, rather longishly for a catchphrase.

“Ararat,” he said. “It’s in northern Turkey.”

“I know where it is,” I said. “And now I know where the movie is, too.”

“What? Oh. Yeah.” And he turned away looking to slap a card in another juror’s mitts.

People were lined up being interviewed against the marquee by TV cameras and their attendant microphone pointers in red blazers. One after another, camera lights went on, microphones were pointed, trenchant comments were made and lights went off.

An older woman passed by and saw my neck tag.

“Oh, I better not mention it to you. You’re a judge.”

“Oh, it’s OK,” I said.

“Oh, nothing,” she said. “I’m the filmmaker’s grandmother and I want everyone to know how wonderful he is.”

A young man in a white shirt with no collar looked at me funny.

“Aren’t you one of the judges?”

“Guilty.”

“Which one did you vote for?” he asked.

I looked puzzled. This was the first night. We hadn’t seen any of the entrants yet.

“I mean, you are one of this year’s judges, aren’t you?” he asked.

“Yes, but we haven’t seen the films yet.”

“Then how can you judge them?”

“We’ll be seeing them over the next week, then we’ll judge.”

“But I thought you already saw them.”

“No.”

He looked at me like I obviously didn’t know what I was talking about and that unless I told him the truth about which film I voted for, he wasn’t going to waste his time with me. He didn’t and left, disappointed.

A blond woman in a black dress introduced herself.

“I’m from Scottsdale,” she said. “I read your reviews in The Arizona Republic. But what I want to know is why doesn’t Phoenix have a film festival?

“We do.”

“We do?”

“There is the Scottsdale Film Festival. I was a juror for it, too, earlier in the spring. At Scottsdale Community College.”

fred linch ast scottsdale film fest

Fred Linch (left) at the Scottsdale International Film Festival

“I must have missed it.”

Meanwhile a radio station DJ was blaring very loud music all across the parking lot and making market-savvy interjections between the songs.

It was beginning to wear on us, so we went back to the hotel.

When we got to the lobby Fred Linch was sitting at a stuffed chair just outside the bar waiting for some friends. Fred is beginning to look a little too much for his own good like what Rod Steiger became. He also has one upper front tooth missing.

He reminded me about the jurors’ breakfast the next morning and told Carole, “There’s a really good discount mall at the edge of town, just take Palm Canyon Road out of town past the I-10 junction and go a couple of miles beyond to the Indian reservation. It’s the greatest discount mall. Bigger than the Fashion Square in Scottsdale.”

Earlier in the evening, he had told Carole she wouldn’t be seeing much of her husband in the next five days.

In both cases, our teeth shriveled for the obvious dismissal of Carole as a mere wife, whose interests must lie in shopping or something else more trivial than the movies we important people were going to watch.

So, we rode the elevator up to our room, enjoyed the air conditioning and prepared for bed.